Choosing Friends

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Choosing Friends (1:19)

“Your friends are people who are going to believe in you. your friends are people who you can trust no matter what. Your friends are people who are going to be there for you. They’re going to stand up for you. They’re going to tell you the truth.”

Role models in order of appearance: Alita Anderson, MD, Pamela J. Meanes, Danya Bacchus, Monica Hall Porter, Ph.D., and Karen Chassin Goldbaum.

Quick Start

1) The video explains that “your friends are people you can trust.” This means a true friend is someone who is honest. What are two ways you can tell that a friend is someone you can trust?

2) The video says to “be selective” when choosing friends. Another way to say this is to be choosy. What is the opposite of being choosy, or selective? Why is it important to be selective with your friends?

3) A speaker in the video reminds listeners to “make sure the people around you have similar interests.” What are some interests you and a friend have in common? A class in school that you both like? An activity outside of school that you both enjoy? A cause that you both care about?

4) In the video, listeners learn that it’s important to “say no” to a friend who wants you to do something you know you shouldn’t. You can practice saying “no” to make this easier. Your friend says: Hey! Do you mind if I copy your math homework just this once? Pleeeeease? What can you say?

5) In the video, you learn that it’s okay for friends to let each other know when they do something that’s “not so cool.” What would you say to a friend who does something that is “not so cool?” Complete the sentence to show what you could say in each situation.

  • A friend borrows your science notes without asking: “Hey, you know, that probably wasn’t the best thing to do. Maybe next time you could ______________________________________________________________.”
  • A friend repeats an unkind rumor about someone you know: “Hey, you know, that probably wasn’t the best thing to do. Maybe next time you
    could ______________________________________________________________.”

6) In the video, a speaker says that “friends might challenge you at times.” Another way to say this is that your friends might not always agree with you! Do you think good friends can disagree and stay friends? Explain your answer.

7) The video points out qualities that are important in a friend. What qualities do you look for in a friend? Why do these qualities matter to you?

Video Transcript

Your friends are people who are going to believe in you. your friends are people who you can trust no matter what. Your friends are people who are going to be there for you. They’re going to stand up for you. They’re going to tell you the truth.

Even at the age of 13, be selective on who you call friend.

You put yourself around people who want to do the same things that you do, and you can’t be afraid to say no to the bad things if that’s not what you want to do.

So make sure the people around you are people who have similar interests to yourself, similar dreams, goals, passions.

If you do something at school that’s not so cool, your friend will be able to say, “Hey, that probably wasn’t the best thing to do. Maybe next time you can do this instead.” And friends will actually be okay with that, especially if it’s coming from a place of love that’s very genuine.

True deep friendships are the things that build you up and make you feel good, might challenge you at times, but only in your best interests. And just know and love your female friends, because they’re going to be a source of strength and companionship that are going to last your whole life through, no matter what else happens.

Discussion Guide

Independent Learning Guide: This all-purpose guide can be used by educators, parents, and mentors to jumpstart a lively discussion about choosing friends.

Classroom Lesson Plan

What does friendship mean to you? Role models in this video share what true friendships are—where to look for them and how to know it when you find them.

Classroom Lesson Plan: This step-by-step lesson plan is available to guide a more in-depth “before, during, and after” learning experience when viewing the video with students. This lesson plan is also suitable for use in after-school programs and other educational settings.

Empowerment Activities

Use Empowerment Activities as a fun way to reinforce the video topic and build community with your students.

Related Empowerment Activities:

Fun Page Activity

Fun Page Activity: Is a friend someone you can trust? Should a friend always agree with you? Do friends need to like the same things? This activity lets you decide what is important in the friends you choose!